Clever Darling
With Michael Jackson dying, for some reason half the world seems personally touched. I know he was a talented musician but the fact that people are crying and posting facebook statuses about a man they never met, probably never saw in concert and might not have even bought a record from seems utterly ridiculous to me. The fact is it’s just one man. People die extremely often funnily enough, but we don’t spend every minute of the day weeping because people are dying all over the world. Cry and facebook post when something tragic happens, terrorist attack kills hundreds, that’s bad, mass death, disasters, those are terrible things and they’re very upsetting. But one man died, at age 50, after achieving huge things with his life and the world is turned upside down because he’s gone? What?

My reaction to death is rather a heartless one. It’s sad, yes, but it’s natural, it happens, it has to happen. Losing people hurts, but it’s inevitable that we will, and apart from anything else, save your sorrow for people that actually matter to you, rather than celebrities that mean nothing.

That’s something else that really annoys me: celebrity worship. One of my friends, C, is practically in love with a celebrity singer. She’s met him once, backstage after a concert, when she gave him a gift, as adoring fans often do, and he said that he liked her hair. She frantically gathers photos of him, posters, merchandise, goes to concerts, frequents forums, is part of the fan club, wants the band’s logo tattooed on her skin. It’s pathetic. And since she started to like this band and this singer, she hasn’t looked at what I’ll refer to as a ‘real’ guy since. For all intents and purposes, celebrities are not real people to us. They aren’t accessible. But she and many others all over the world seem to have deluded themselves into thinking that there are enough talented and good looking celebrities in the world for all of us. There aren’t. There really aren’t. When you’re busy staring up at those famous people and following their lives, you’re missing out on your own. I’m not stupid, I appreciate the good looks and talents of celebrities, but I’m quite happy with the real world thankyou very much, it costs altogether too much to run around after people who already have thousands if not millions of people doing it already.

P.S. Going on holiday tomorrow, don't know if I'll post again before then. I probably won't have internet access at all while I'm away but I'll still write posts and then upload them when I get back, I know you don't want to miss a day of my fascinating life :)
Clever Darling
So I went swimming today with R, J, V and S, which was fun. The public swimming pool was a bit rubbish and it was the first time I'd been since we'd left New Zealand so I'm a bit out of shape :S I'll have to work on that when I get back from holiday.

D wasn't here for very long. I don't think I've mentioned before that his mother always seems to be really aggressive towards him. I don't really understand why, he's not particularly abrasive, he has a bit of a temper but that's nothing abnormal in a teenage male. And yet it seems any time she talks to him she's snapping at him or complaining or ordering him around or yelling at him. I mean, I know most teenagers don't get on brilliantly with their parents but this is odd. Especially because she's a hell of a lot nicer to his younger brother. It's very weird and somewhere between annoying and upsetting. None of us seem to have very good relationships with our parents these days, then again, mine aren't that bad.

I know I've complained about my parents before, and what I said then remains true now, but they do have their good days. Especially my mother. She's very friendly to my friends, and much more rational than my father. She's also become quite a lot calmer in recent months, her temper isn't quite as quick as it used to be, which definitely makes life easier. Dad's better with me at the moment, he hasn't been unfairly snapping at me this last week so that's looking better. We're going away on Saturday though so things are likely to go downhill fairly rapidly as I'm taken away from my internet, my room, D, and pretty much everything I enjoy.

I saw him for the last time before I get back today. Leaving hurt rather a lot. I think my eyes actually filled up, but that's really weird for me. I'm going to blame it on a hormonal imbalance so I don't ruin my reputation. It's only 8 days after all. I can make it through 8 days without him...day 9 is going to be rather nice though.
Clever Darling
Hi, it's me again.

Today has been pretty awesome. My last exam (which I don't think went that well), sitting in the sunshine for the rest of the morning, then to the city, reading Marilyn Manson's autobiography (surprisingly good), my singing audition (not so good, first few notes were all flat), drama audition (brilliant, loads of fun), then R and his bf J showed up and we were ambling around for a bit before getting the train to D's, where we watched Saw and generally entangled with eachother :) I also ended up being licked by D, R and J (on the face) one after the other because they thought it was funny and kissing all three of them since they thought it was funny.

Tomorrow I'm going swimming and then going to check out my photography work and kidnapping D. All fun. I really don't want to go on holiday, then all this fun ends. :(
Clever Darling
Ultra short post because it's morning :)

Yesterday
My laptop broke, then my internet broke separately. Yesterday did not get off to a good start. Then I did science revision, still not going well. Then I went to D's...and that was awful. Well, actually, it was loverly, as ever. But we have to work with continuity. The little white rabbit has officially been claimed my be and named Blossom(despite being male)/Demon Spunk (Spunky to friends). It's adorabubble.

Today
MY LAST EXAM IS TODAY!!! Last one, no more!!! Woooooo. On the downside, I have singing and acting auditions this afternoon and my 'friends' have decided that since their audition slots are a bit later than mine they're going to basically tell me to f*** off into the city on my own for the afternoon while they stay together. Loving people my friends. BUT because I have an exam today I should start the day be seeing D and that puts everything on a shiny happy note.
Clever Darling
I said in an earlier post that I didn’t love D. And when I said it it was true, but it’s no longer honesty and since this is an honest blog this should be altered.

It’s difficult.

When I was broken, I thought that it would be hopeless to even look for a good period of time, something like six months was what I had in mind I think, at the very least, and for a teenager with a love of interaction and relationships, that’s quite a long time. I spent four days hardly saying one word. I’m a talkative and confident teenage girl and I didn’t speak for four days. I barely ate. I just sat at my computer and tried to figure out how on earth I was going to bring together the wreckage that had been made out of my world. Because he was my world. I’d spent nearly a year devoting every waking minute to being there for him, to dealing with any problem he had, defending him, watching him grow, loving him. The irony was I only started to love him after he’d said he loved me. I thought about him day and night and all I wanted to do was make him happy. I don’t really want to tell you about this. I haven’t told anybody about this. But it’s important for what I’ll say next.

But the fact was, over those months, I couldn’t make him happy. I gave him things, I gave him my dignity and my intellect and my attention and everything I had. But he never returned it. He seemed to make excuses not to see me and I was the one who started the kiss, I was the one who started conversations and automatically looked for him in a crowd. Not once was it the other way around.

And I saw that, but I told myself he was shy, not yet used to it, I made excuses because I loved him. That’s what we do. And sometimes, the times that he did pay some attention back, that made it seem worth it. Now I realize that I deserved, I do deserve better.

So it had all come crashing down on me. And I hated him. I hated him with the kind of passion I’ve never felt before and maybe won’t feel again. I wanted to kill him, to hurt him, I wanted the world to take him and beat him and ruin him the way that it had ruined me through him. I couldn’t look at him. Touching him made me cringe and flinch. I would have cried at night if I could. I cried once, one night, when it ended. I haven’t since, I spent those days holding them in and at night I couldn’t let go to do it. And I never did. Acting like it never happened isn’t an enviable trait. It’s a harmful one.

But I’m not an idiot. I recognized necessity. He was a part of my group of friends. He was going to be there, at least until the school year ended. I don’t know whether to be proud of myself or not but I decided that I was going to be friends with him. The person who had ensured that a rumour and reminder of my humiliation would follow me for years to come, the person who broke my heart properly for the first time in one of the most painful ways possible. I thought it would be the best way to move on. I even put him in touch with a gay guy through a friend and they ended up together. How many people in the world know what it’s like to wake up every day and laugh and smile and hug the one person on the planet that you would genuinely kill if given the chance? There must be quite a few people out there who know what I’m talking about.

So I was painfully, agonizingly trampling on through every week, hurt but only on the inside when something interesting happened. Somebody I met nearly two years ago showed up again and was there. Was actually there, imperfect like every other person, but open, kind, and painfully (for me) willing to offer this strange concept of ‘love’. I started going out with you because you were there and I couldn’t see a reason not to D. And I am so glad that I made that decision, even if maybe I shouldn’t have gone into a relationship where I couldn’t actually give back.

You make everything seem better. When I’m angry you calm me down, you compliment me far too much (which annoys the hell out of me because I don’t believe you one bit, you’re clearly insane) and you’re just there. And that’s exactly what I needed, even though I didn’t know it.

I don’t hurt anymore, not in that horrible empty way I did up until so recently. I don’t go to sleep at night thinking about what an idiot I was for all that time, or wondering what I did to deserve what happened. I go to sleep thinking about you, and how amazing you are. I didn’t want to love you. I didn’t think I could, knowing so recently how much it hurts when it ends. But I do.

Thankyou so much. Thankyou for seeing me in this golden light that makes the flaws I see nonexistent to you, thankyou for putting up with me and all my damage, thankyou for calling me beautiful even though you know I don’t believe you, thankyou for saving me.
Clever Darling
Yesterday was pretty damn hectic. Woke up, went and got in with D, realised that I'd spent an hour in there, panicked, got up, dressed etc, realised that half the people who were supposed to be coming weren't, nagged some people, then D and V's boyfriend S went just a bit mad and then H got all annoyed because she couldn't hear the films we were watching so I was snapping at D and S to try and keep her settled and then S started throwing things around in a rather overly childish manner and I got smacked in the head by a mars bar and I now have a big fat lump and I woke up with a massive hairdo and feeling all ugly and I'm exhausted.

So all in all, rather good really. Busy time now. D's tomorrow, last exam and singing and acting auditions for next year Wednesday, probably D here and maybe swimming on Thursday, party at C's Friday, and away on holiday on Saturday (not sure how much internet access I'll get while I'm away, posts might be sporadic). I'm always busy. Today however, I am too tired to do anything at all, even rant about something.
Clever Darling
I got back too late last night to be bothered to post before going to work.

Yesterday
My second to last exam *dance*. Only one left!!! I think it went ok, but I'm not sure. Damn I hate science. And then I went to town with R and V and S and we just hung around for a while. A horse tried to eat me and Mum saw me and R in the same place for the first time since February. She said afterwards that she was really proud of me for still being such good friends with him. I don't know whether I deserve that.

Then I went to D's...yays...I convinced a baby chicken not to die (cute fluffy thing) but I still haven't got that damn rabbit!!

Today
Work, ugh. Now D's at mine, staying for the night because I'm having a party tomorrow night he can't come to because of school. I'm really hungry...

Today's topic for discussion is: idols. Everyone has somebody they look up to above all others but mine isn't some dead writer from the 18th century, or a politician who makes long pretty speeches, although I do have favourites among both. But whenever somebody asks me who I really idolise, I think of Zoe Margolis. She's possibly the most interesting person I've ever heard of. Author of the blog 'Girl with a One Track Mind', she's a sex writer. I know most people don't idolise that kind of professional, but she is really awesome. She not only shamelessly wrote details of her sex life on the internet, but she carried on when she was 'outed' by the press. She's incredibly brave and her writing shows that she has a great sense of humour and adventure. Who wouldn't want to be like that? It's not as if she's a prostitute or anything (an industry I have no objection to whatsoever as long as it isn't slavery), she's just an ordinary woman who showed the UK that it's ok to be a woman with a sex drive, and an open mind when it comes to sex. I wish there were more people in the world like her. And reading her blog for the first time last summer and every time since taught me so many things about life and love and well, a few other things too I suppose... :D
Clever Darling
It did rain yesterday, but it was very warm and it was only light rain so it was actually quite nice to walk in. Went back to D's to take him home yesterday evening and ended up staying for ages watching chicks hatch :) Mum thought it was amazing, although the fact that they were apparently wearing little eggshell Hitler helmets was a bit worrying...

I have my second to last exam tomorrow, I hate hate hate science. I know I should be revising, but God it takes a lot of effort. I'm having one of those days where I just want to stay in bed and not do anything, but I have things I need to do :( On the upside, I'm going to D's tomorrow after the exam, so I suppose that balances it out a bit :)

Today, I'm thinking philosophically. This concept of love that it seems most humans are obsessed with has always interested me, not just as an emotional thing, but as an understanding thing, I mean, other animals don't have love, so what is it's purpose? What is love anyway? Is it just a strong feeling of sexual attraction or desire for a person? Is it something stronger, a deep emotional attachment, or a recognition of fate, of that fact that you're meant to be with a person because it's a part of your destiny. Just how many different kinds of love are there? Can you force yourself to feel or not to feel love? Why is it seemingly so much more powerful than other emotions? It seems like a ridiculously complex idea and nobody has the answers. Everyone has different opinions, people think it's pointless, that it's just painful, that it's amazing, that it's essential to being happy. Maybe it's all of those things. It does seem that love is a huge part of what makes events take place, wars, births, history has been written because of love. We don't really know what it is, but we do recognise how intensely important it is. And when you feel it, really feel it, it seems that there isn't a better high on earth. And when it's over, there isn't a greater low. But we still heal and go back for more, over and over again, because maybe that low is worth it, it must be.
Clever Darling
No sunshine today :( If it starts to rain it may just make my walk up to see D a little unpleasant, damn long distances! I think I shall do some catching up on my reading today. I did a lot of reading at the weekend when I was sick, but if I don't read something every day I start to get annoyed. My list of books to read is so long that I shouldn't be taking time off. I love books. All kinds of books. I'd read the dictionary if I could find a good reason to. I'm running out of room in my room to keep my ever expanding library in and I don't know what I'm going to do when I go to university, maybe I'll use all my books as furniture and save space :)

What shall I tell you about today? My dog is suggesting her, she's not very interesting, but I'll mention her so I can complain about her in the future. Ruby's a tri colour jac russell, big eyes, small brain. She's a very good guard dog and makes it her duty to wake me up every morning when the postman arrives, such as today. I don't actually care when the postman arrives and this leads to some serious disagreements between us. I don't really get on with that many personalities in my life, do I?

I went out for lunch with H yesterday, yes, I know I don't like her, but I think I've mentioned that for now I have to just get over that. But we didn't quite have an arguement, instead we gossiped about various other friends, discussed the outdated concept of marriage (neither of us likes the idea of taking on a name and becoming Mrs Someone because it makes you inferior; a possession of your husband) and tried and failed miserably to split a chocolate tiffin (very hard icing :) ). Overall quite a fun afternoon.

Then to D's. He has a baby albino rabbit. I must have the baby albino rabbit. It's adorable. Plus the assorted other fluffy animals, he knows I'm only with him for his pets. I think I'm going to move in with him in a few months when his collie has puppies, far too cute to leave. I don't think he'll be complaining about that idea either. Dad might just a bit though.

P.s. From now on, if I can't think of a post title, it will be a randomly selected song lyric. Keeps life interesting.
Clever Darling
It's another gloriously sunny day here ladies and gentlemen, with some light cloud...Wait, this isn't a weather report, but the sun is out :)

Today I shall get dressed at some point (10:25am and still not doing anything, wooo) and meander up to get the bus to D's house, where I shall spend my afternoon. My dear father is not happy about picking me up. You see, Dad and I used to get along pretty well, quite similar you see. But lately, partly since I started going out with D, and partly I think because he's stressed at work, my Dad has hated me. He snaps at me, yells at me, ignores me for days on end for no reason, acts like I've done something wrong and occasionally says really nasty things aboutme unprovoked. And that partly makes me really angry, and partly upsets me. I mean, what am I supposed to do? I can't help it if he hates his job and just because I'm the youngest in the house, and therefore apparently the most defenceless, he thinks it's ok to take it out on me?

Mum's not much help either. My mother has been 'sick' for as long as I can remember. I say 'sick' because it's rare for anything diagnosable to be actually wrong with her. She stresses, about everything, that manifests into physical symptoms and then she demands that a doctor sees her.It annoys me. She likes the attention of people when she's 'ill'. She's incredibly nice to everyone except me and dad, she makes things for other people and their children, she's friendly and she laughs and smiles. At home, she doesn't laugh or smile very much. She just yells at us about not doing jobs we didn't even know needed doing, or not appreciating her, or says the dog has to go because it's getting under her feet (when she wanted a dog in the first place). She seems determined to make life revolve around her and whenever I exhibit a desire to live without giving a crap about her, that starts another tirade of abuse about how she may as well just leave since nobody wants her around. One the good days she's fun to be around and she smiles a lot. But there aren't many of those.

So maybe you can tell we aren't a happy family. But nobody sees that because as soon as there's someone else around it's all happy and fake. And people wonder why I have people in the house all the time. When somebody's been here and they leave, the mood just drops. I can't wait to move out of this place and stop having to bounce between mother's constant needs and dad's moodswings.
Clever Darling
Ok, I lied. I do mind that my 'friends' are all going out and going to the cinema tomorrow without me. I get invited as an afterthought, when they know it's too late for me to organise coming. I normally organise everything, I host parties at my house because nobody else has the room. I buy food, I let it go when they break my stuff, which they invariably do, and I'm the one who gets yelled at by my parents for the noise and the mess. You know what? For all that, I'd like to be able to go one week, just ONE week, without being reminded how utterly crap my friends are, and then having to get along and have a good time with them five minutes later because there's nobody else. Call me an arrogant cow, but I have to hang out with smart people. If I don't, I get miserable, and bored and just generally...imagine the incredible hulk. That kind of thing. And my 'friends' are the only smart people at my school so until September, they're what I've got. I've already managed for three years (I should be glad it's been three not five) and now that blissful time of freedom is edging closer it's getting harder and harder to put up with them. I don't want to be around them anymore. I really don't. Let's take a quick look at why. H, smart, rich, snob. Pretends to be modest, but more arrogant than I am, she'll never admit it. C, big mouth, can be ok, but never ever admits she's wrong even though she seems to think on a totally different wavelength from normal people and seems to hold the most ridiculous and faulty opinions ever. R, well, we know all about him. S and S, I can deal with. I don't have that much contact with either and apart from being mildly childish and not as smart as the others, they're ok. And that's the bulk of my school crowd, apart from V, who is the one I don't dislike, although she is somewhat easily led for the sake of a quiet life. Now, if C or H read this, they'd go crazy. They'd say I was a stuck up b****, that I thought I was better than everyone else, but I'm not perfect either and it's time someone brought me down to earth. Well, they can go crawl into a ditch. They frequently make my life miserable and reading something honest about themselves for once might do them some good. Of course, they never will, but it sure as hell makes me feel better.

*End rant*
Clever Darling
Today I played a computer game. Fascinating.
But there was a massive thunderstorm, and I was rather impressed. I used to be terrified of thunderstorms, I suppose most children are. But now I just enjoy the smell of the rain and the strange zigzags of the lightning. The massive claps of thunder overheard are pretty damn awesome. And there wasn't even a powercut, bonus. Once when we lived in New Hampshire in the States, there was a massive thunderstorm that wiped out all the power for about six hours. I was around 8 or 9 and spent the entire time under a table, clutching my toy dog and hoping that it would stop. I wasn't brave back then.
My friends are going to shopping tomorrow without me. I wasn't invited. I don't mind, I haven't got any money and probably wouldn't have gone anyway, but I wasn't even invited. One of the things I'm most looking forward to about new school in September is new people. New friends, new teachers, new opportunities, and new males of course :) Not that I'd ever cheat or anything, I'm just keeping in mind that the opportunities will be there come September should I be available :)
Clever Darling
Yesterday
I actually took the day off work yesterday, unheard of. But when one is ill one has little choice. But I was really annoyed to miss out on another set of wages since I just took two days off for exams. Seeing as I only work two days a month, this is serious problem. And I have another one booked off because I'm going on holiday on the 27th, it's quite ridiculous. Anyway, so I spent all day reading, which was productive, I finished one book, read another and started another. Go me.

Today
I feel rather better, but not 100%. I spent this morning making plasticine models, because I'm realy cool, but took them apart because they refused to look how I wanted. Now I'm sitting here with nothing to do, wondering how to waste the rest of my day :)
Have I mentioned that my defining feature is ambition? I have goals, you see, and I don't let anything get in my way. Recently that seems to have lead to me being fairly selfish, heartless and detatched from other people. I don't seem to feel compassion any more, or sympathy really. And although I recognise this, I don't really care. People hurt eachother, but I never let me down, so who's the one I should care about the most?
Clever Darling
The sun is out today, yay! English weather gives us reason to celebrate even the smallest bit of warmth.
It's really hard to find a copy of Ovid's Amores with a running commentary it seems, even my beloved local bookshop doesn't seem to stock it so I may have to order it online, which annoys me. I like to be able to see a book before I buy it, especially something as specific as this.
Today has once again been busy, with me playing Diablo II all day and...well, that's about it really. I have work tomorrow, which upsets me deeply.
I said I'd introduce you to my friends, and I will, one or two at a time so as not to overload you. They all have their ups and downs, and sometimes I do love them all, but there are some less lovable than others. There's V, she's my best friend I suppose. She's a kind, gentle and funny person who tends to avoid fights and confrontation by being universally nice to everybody no matter what she thinks. I love her, she's a brilliant comedian and obviously everybody gets along with her. Out of all my closest friends I think she's the only one who's flaws don't stand out really starkly to me.
Clever Darling
Yesterday
Yesterday I sat around all day, did very little until the afternoon, when my boyfriend came round. It's always very relaxing to be with him, but he can also be very childish sometimes, like thinking that really immature jokes are funny, but I guess a lot of males are like that. Plus he's younger than me. Also, he has psoriasis, which obviously isn't his fault, which can make him look a bit unattractive if it flares up. He looks very soft and gentle though, his face and eyes are very innocent looking. He's funny, but not witty. He's nice, but childish, as mentioned. He's not a genius, but he doesn't seem to realise that he's not an idiot yet. I don't love him, I refuse to love anybody right now, and he knows that. Also, although I do really like him, a lot of the things he does annoy me a bit. He makes bad decisions about his lifestyle, like smoking and drinking too much. But he is also very kind, considerate, gentle and loving so I suppose it's a balance thing. Obviously the good outweighs the bad points, otherwise I wouldn't be with him, but I can't help but be honest. Besides, that's what blogs are for right? I always take a long time to decide whether or not I want to show somebody my blogs because, well, they're honest. I don't want loads of people getting offended because I've said they aren't as wonderful as they think they are, or thinking I'm weak or pathetic because, yes, ok, I am still hurt about what happened in February and I think I will be for a long time yet, just deal with it, it hurt. A lot of the people around me don't really seem to understand just how much, either because I didn't let them see, like my parents and family, or because they don't really care enough, like my friends. Ah yes, my friends. They deserve a post of their own.

Today
Today I had one of my few exams left. Only two more!!! I think it went well, I don't know for sure though. No exams until next Wednesday now, yay! I also went to D's again, and just spent the afternoon watching movies and cuddling, which is always nice.
I tried to do some work on my Latin just now, but I haven't got the concentration. I started trying to teach myself Latin about a year ago now and the main thing is building up my vocabulary so my language is more functional. I want to get Ovid's Amores to read with a running translation, I know that'll help me learn because I'll get used to seeing the words. I love Latin, it's a beautiful and simple language and it really helps you to understand English better by explaining roots of words.
Clever Darling
My sister's wedding invitations arrived today. She's marrying the man she's been with for years and years now, and she's 27 now so it's a perfect sort of age. I'm always jealous of my older brother and sister, who are in fact my half brother and half sister. Well, technically my sister is legally my full sister because when she turned 18 she had her name changed to my dad's last name. Anyway, my sister and brother both have conventional good looks, tall, skinny, no deformities to mention. And then there's me, average height, chunky, hooked nose, clumsy. Admittedly there's nothing really to be done about it, but it's always annoyed me. Shows the inferiority of my dad's genetics.
Today I have decided to stay at home, in my room, in ugly clothes, and do little to nothing. I shall read methinks, I'm rereading all of the David Eddings books because they're brilliant. I might also start looking at the topic I have an exam in on Thursday. But essentially: relaxation.
Clever Darling
Good morning! Being off school is pretty damn amazing, study leave rocks. No exams until Thursday, nothing planned, I do so love just relaxing. Of course, I'll be completely bored in a few days for sure.
Did I mention that I hate my job? I wash dishes and make drinks at a cafe in town and I despise it. Utterly. Minimum wage and the worst boss on the planet make your authoress positively miserable. But money's money and until I have another job I'll stay there.
Right now I'm watching the Muppet's Treasure Island, contemplating what biscuit I want to eat and wondering if I should put on some socks because my toes are really cold. Most exciting.
Clever Darling
Hello world!
I already have a blog, but it's not exactly what I would call public reading material so I thought I'd make a real one as well, since I seem to have developed a compulsive need to write down everything I think :)
Well, me. I'm a teenage girl living in England, I'm smart, funny and sexy, but that's what I tell all the guys :) I love reading, writing, music, hanging out with my friends, I'm like a normal teenager, but smarter, and yes, more arrogant.
I'm currently with someone, we've only been together just over three weeks and in the relationships respect I am not like normal teenagers. I haven't had many boyfriends, the ones I have had have been, well, disasters. Most recently was R, who I was with for nearly a year before he announced that he was gay, and had always known this. Now, considering I was pretty damn into him, that hurt. A lot. And, since it's one of the first things I've told you, you might be able to tell it left a mark. But this new guy, D, he's pretty amazing. Younger than me, so maybe a little immature sometimes, but pretty smart, really nice, considerate, complimentary and maybe a little too full on. I feel safe with him.
What else is important...for now, that'll do methinks. I will be back